Game 1 Rays Recap: Monday July 23: 7-6 Loss: That game SUCKED.

(DISCLAIMER: This blog was written BEFORE Gary was announced to be going on the DL. All my opinions about his laziness were under the assumption of pure laziness. Not that his groin injury was acting up again. This is the end of my disclaimer. Bye)

Damn. After games like that one, it can be really tough to write these blogs. I won’t lie to you guys.

I always try to be positive and funny but shit…games like last night can really piss me off.

Trying to decide where to jump in right now…Sevy or Gary. This is a real “pick your poison” scenario.

It’s like when you were a little kid and you had two horrible options: Would you rather go to the dentist, or go shopping with your mom? Both of these SUCKED.

I’m basically feeling the same exact thing right now. Alright, let’s start with Sevy. This is basically the equivalent of taking a nice, fun-filled trip to the dentist…

WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH SEVY?!

5 IP, 11 hits, 7 runs, 6 ER, 8 K’s, 2 homers. Sheesh.

Do we need to file a missing person’s report? Maybe, maybe. Because that is not Luis Severino! He is MISSING.

Our Cy Young Ace is MIA. I meant “Missing in Action,” but maybe he ran off to the other MIA, to South Beach, and is out getting faded every night. The fame went to his head, so he is out partying and living his best life.

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Then, who is the other inidivual pretending to be Sevy, you ask? An impostor, of course! Maybe a clone. Maybe his long lost twin. But, whoever it is, he has been pitching like shit and we desperately need the real Sevy back.

All kidding aside, I’m really hoping that this is just the pitching equivalent of a slump. Judge went through a big hitting slump last year. I’m confident that Sevy will snap out of this. But, fuck. This has been rough to watch.

Okay, let’s shift to Gary. AKA Shopping with your mom. Doesn’t matter if it’s grocery shopping or clothes shopping. They both suck. Well, clothes shopping definitely sucks more. At least you can probably snag some free food samples at a grocery store.

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Priorities, am I right?

Gary, Gary, Gary…

For a guy that is so talented, you can be so fucking lazy.

First, you let Bauers come around to score on that bullshit passed ball. If you actually hustled, we would have been able to get him out at home.

And then….that grounder to the game. Holy fucking shit, Gary. HUSTLE. Damnit.

I don’t know if my true anger is conveyed into blog form, but I’m so annoyed at this guy. He has such raw baseball talent, but he acts like he doesn’t care at all sometimes. It’s unreal.

You’re the starting catcher for the New York Yankees. How about giving some effort?

Alright, let’s recap the scoring a little bit. I’ve taken my trip to the dentist, and went shopping with my mom.

Update: This isn’t fun…

Like I said above, Bauers scored the first run for Tampa on that stupid passed ball.

Miggy Andújar hit a RBI single to tie it up in the 2nd, though. The game remained at 1-1 for a few innings and it looked like we would have a nice pitcher’s duel:

Sevy vs. the entire Rays bullpen. Well, that turned out to be dead wrong.

Sevy gave up a 3 run homer, to Bauers of all people, and just like that, we’re down 4-1. Luis Severino giving up a 3 run shot? What kind of world is this?

Not the kind of world that I want to live in, I’ll tell you that much…

But, we’re the Yankees after all. We always fight back.

Giancarlo scored on a passed ball of our own and then Gary knocked home Hicksy for a RBI single. See – Gary can be good! He was helping us out with a big RBI single…too bad it ended up being a waste.

Cutting the lead to 4-3? I thought this game was going to be a piece of cake. “There’s no way that Sevy is going to give up any more runs! We’ve got this, easy.”

I was getting ready to light my metaphorical cigar. Not really, but being down by 1 to the Rays in the 6th? That’s no problem.

HOWEVER, I was forgetting that we were dealing with impostor Sevy: a solo homer, a RBI single, and a fielder’s choice later…and we were now losing 7-3. Fuck.

I thought Sevy had everything under control. BUT

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But, once again, we fought back. This had somewhat of a playoff atmosphere. No, I’m not talking about our opponent. Because the Rays suck. And, I’m not talking about the stadium atmosphere. Because the Trop also sucks.

But just the whole “back and forth” scoring scenario was really exciting. If only we could’ve won it.

We loaded the bases in the 7th because were the goddamn Yankees. With Didi and Giancarlo coming up! LET’S GO

After a RBI groundout for Didi, Giancarlo “The Terminator” laced a screaming line drive into center for 2 more runs!

Giancarlo has been a goddamn machine. Dare I say it, the Terminator, perhaps?

But for real, he has been mashing the ball. Love it.

After Sevy’s horrible outing, Chad, Warren, and AJ Cole each pitched a shutout inning. We we’re primed for a comeback W. Let’s get it…

In the 9th, we headed for the comeback. First, Gardy got an infield single. Then, Judge drew a walk. Didi sacrificed both of our guys over, leaving first base open.

Of course, the Rays walked Giancarlo. Bases Loaded. One out. Down by one.

Hicksy up to bat. It would have been amazing for Hicks to do something big here, but he grounded into a fielder’s choice. Gardy out at home, but Hicks safe at first.

We still had a chance. And it all came down to…Gary Sanchez.

GARY. WHAT THE FUCK?!

Did you Hicks hustle into second base?

If you were running down the line, like you actually gave a FUCK, you would have been safe at first. And the game would have been tied. And we would have fucking won, I bet.

But you didn’t even give us the opportunity.

I mean, come on…Look at this lack of hustle.

Inexcusable.

This gif would be so much funnier if it wasn’t so true.

And if it wasn’t making fun of one of our star players. But it is the most accurate…figure your shit out, Gary. Hustle.

Shit, that was tough to go through again. That game sucked.

But, let’s put it behind us and beat the shit out of Tampa tonight. I’m so tired to losing to this scrub team. And, I’m especially tired of losing them in their shithole of a stadium.

It’s time to bounce back. Let’s get it.

LET’S GO YANKS.

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